Jay Parker and the terrible horrible no good very bad week (sorry for long post)

Most of you have hopefully heard of the book "Alexander and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day."  It's a great children's book about a kid that is having a horrible day.  The constant refrain is that he is going to move to Australia.  Well, I can totally understand how he felt considering the week I had last week.  It was a doozy.

I was reminded again earlier this week that This Is Africa by the fact that the water went out again.  2nd time in 3 weeks.  Nothing says, "You aren't in Virginia" any more like not being able to wash your hands.  My lovely wife wasn't too thrilled with that.  My little guy started pre-school this week, and immediately started screaming when he was left by my lovely wife.  He said he liked it, but continued to scream when she dropped him off.  Now he's complaining about going. 

We began hearing a scraping noise when driving the car when we'd slow down.  I didn't think too much of it, as it would stop and we wouldn't hear it again for a while.  I set up a time to take it into the garage on Friday, and figured it would be ok.  My lovely wife called me on Wednesday to say that the temp gauge was going all the way up, and it looked like the car was overheating.  She went to get anti-freeze for the car, but the reservoir was full.  So, I called the garage and changed the time to Thursday morning.  I then had to change the reservation for our rental to Wednesday.  However, the power was out, and so they couldn't charge my credit card immediately.  So, I took the card and waited to hear from them.  Thursday we took the car in to be looked at, and immediately got stuck in traffic for 45 minutes trying to move 5 miles.  My daughter got sick and had to be picked up from school.  The garage informed me a sensor was bad and needed to be replaced on the temp gauge and our brakes were about to go.  Total cost?  $945.  Friday my lovely wife dropped me off at 715 to pay for the car and go.  I waited 45 minutes before finally telling someone I was trying to give them money, why weren't they letting me.  I got the car paid for, headed into traffic and noticed that my fuel gauge was low.  Pulled into a service station, they pumped the gas, and I gave them my bank card.  It was refused.  My Bank suspected fraud due to a large amount of money being charged on it in South Africa.  (I had already told them 4 times that I lived in South Africa.)  I paid for the fuel, got to the office, called my Bank, and sorted it out.  They said the card would work.  When I went to pay for the rental, it was refused.  Paid cash for the rental, went home and called my Bank.  They had cancelled my card because of suspected fraud.  Apparently, it was being used in South Africa!  Strangely enough, they had cancelled it on the 15th of this month, but it still worked.  When I spoke to someone and mentioned I was overseas and now had no way to access my bank account, he told me I needed to be professional.  I told him I have banked with them for 15 years.  I have numerous accounts with them, I live overseas, it's the weekend, I have no access to my account, and I am the customer so I DON'T HAVE TO BE PROFESSIONAL!

After being sent back to customer service, the problem was dealt with.  Saturday was supposed to be better, but before my son's soccer practice I was swinging him around like I usually do (he grabs onto my hand and I swing him) when I heard a pop.  The tendon in his arm had moved to the side over his elbow and had to be popped back into place.  Would have been a good time to have my bank card, wouldn't it?  Luckily it wasn't too bad, we paid and off we went.  He's fine and doesn't seem to remember it.  On top of it all, I kept getting duty calls from the same lady asking about visas. 

So, my terrible, horrible no good very bad week seems to be over.  Here's hoping the new one is better and we can go back to being happy here in SA.  Alexander was wrong though.  If he'd moved to Australia, his bank would have frozen his account due to suspected fraud even though he would have told them previously that he was moving there.

A Surprise vist to my teen years

As I've said before, I am required to take a different route every day to and from work when I walk.  One of my routes is through the mall across the street from the Consulate.  Usually I also stop and get a muffin and coffee on my way in too.  However, I started to notice something, and it's made me regress to being a teenager.

Apparently South Africans LOVE early to mid-1990s R&B.  Just now I heard "I Swear" by All-4-One.  The other day I heard "Anniversary" from Tony! Toni! Tone!  I even heard "Comforter" from Shai.  How does that happen?  I go to get lunch and the next thing I know I'm listening to "Freak Me" by Silk.  Or "Lately" by Jodeci.  Or even, strangely enough, "Giving Him Something He Can Feel" by En Vogue.

Here I am trying to have lunch in peace, or buying a pair of trousers, and instead I'm transported back to Senior Prom and dancing to SWV's "I Get Weak".  Or walking on the beach after a date (which is what we ALWAYS did) and hearing "On Bended Knee" by Boyz II Men.  Or standing in the parking lot of the Bennigan's with my friends trying to figure out what we want to do, but we never do so we stand in that parking lot for 2 hours. 

It's hard to believe it's almost been 20 years since I graduated from High School.  In some ways, I guess I'm still that teenager who appears to be loud and out going but is really unsure of himself and shy.  I'm just about 50 pounds heavier than he was.  That said, I have done some pretty cool stuff in the intervening years, including marrying my lovely and way too understanding of my geekiness wife, and having my two lovely children.  Sitting at the foodcourt listening to that music again, it does take me back.  I can picture certain times with each song, and they make me smile. 

I just never thought I'd be having flashbacks while eating french fries in Johannesburg.

Rugby, sporting bias and Braai's in South Africa

Currently, we're in the midst of the Rugby World Cup.  (Actually it's Rugby Union's World Cup.  Rugby League's is apparently in 2013.  The differences between the two are quite interesting really.  Union has 15 people per side and League has 13.  League is much more like American Football and.... I've lost you haven't I?)  Anyways, this is a big thing here in South Africa.  If you've seen the movie "Invictus", you'll see how important Rugby actually is here.  They are the defending World Cup Winners, and are expected to do quite well this year too.  Everywhere you look everyone is wearing the green shirts with gold on them to support the team.  It's actually quite cool.

However, watching anyone but the Boks play can be interesting to say the least.  The announcers are shameless in their promotion of the Boks.  They openly root against teams considered a threat to South Africa.  I watched the England vs. Georgia game and my lovely English Lass was apalled at the bias.  Granted, England didn't play to the top of their potential, but they won the match 41-10.  It wasn't close!  But to hear the announcers talk, they barely squeaked by a gritty Georgian team.

Let me be honest, I'm ok with a bit of homerism.  I feel like it adds a bit to the game.  However, when two neutrals are playing, don't talk down one to make your side look good.  It reminded me of the 1994 NCAA Men's Basketball Championship game, when the announcers openly rooted for Duke to win against Arkansas.  (That's always burned me.  How could you root for Cherokee Parks?)

In other news, coming up on Saturday here in Johannesburg is Braai-day.  A Braai is a BBQ, and September 24 is set aside for cooking out on the Braai.  Pretty darn cool if you ask me.  Everyone gets sausage, lamb, chicken and beef and cooks out.  Heart attack inducing, but also really good.  I think I'm planning on firing up the grill, sitting outside and havinga  nice glass of a local red wine.  Although it sounds like heaven, there is also a good chance that our water will go out again for 16 hours and we'll have to use the water from the fish pond to flush our toilets.  Remember, this is Africa.

In the quiet...

Since the people reading this are probably friends of mine, I don't have to tell you the my lovely daughter has Autism.  We've been very open about it, and luckily for us she is high functioning.  However, my daughter also has issues when it comes to loud noises.  On Saturday at a birthday party the magician popped balloons and she freaked out.  If there is a huge commotion she will become paralyzed with fear.  It's one of the most heart-breaking things you'll ever see.  This very tall 4 year old just crumbles into a pile and screams.  Because she also has Sensory Processing issues, she covers her eyes as well to try and make the noise stop.  It's almost like she's seeing sounds.

On a similar note, as most of you know, I listen to a lot of music.  Usually it's pumping pretty loudly and it switches my brain off which allows me to stay calm as I suffer ocassionally from anxiety.  Different reactions to the same loud noise.  My lovely daughter does love music too, but usually when it's not too loud and when she can sing very loudly, if not always on key.

The reason I've told you all this is because I've noticed something that maybe my daughter has correct.  Last night when I was sitting in my children's room waiting for them to go to sleep, I had my music on.  It was tuned low so it wouldn't disturb them, and I started to notice something.  Songs I had heard numerous times before sounded different.  There were added parts that made the sound richer and more full.  "Take Five" by Dave Brubek, only one of the greatest jazz songs ever recorded, sounded even better than usual as I could hear all the parts clearly and see how they all fit together.  "Panic Switch" by Silversun Pickups has a stick part from the drummer in the break I had never really heard fully before.  It's pretty intricate. 

It was amazing, and it made me think that maybe too loud is an issue for me too.  Maybe it's an issue with everyone.  Maybe we have everything so loud we can't listen to nuance.  Perhaps the problem with society is that we all have sensory issues, but we can chose to ignore them and we do.  Sadly my daughter can't, so we'll have to figure out how to turn the sound down on the world for her.  Maybe we all can do that, and listen to the intricate parts of life, and see how we all fit together.

An American overseas on September 11.

It was difficult not being in the United States after 9/11.  I didn't know where my friends were, the telephone system was inundated, and the internet wasn't yet grown-up enough.  It wasn't until days later that I learned all of my friends were safe.

Then I experienced something weird.  There was a delay in dealing with it.  I wasn't immediately affected by the trauma.  I was in Suriname at the time, and although there were problems, I wasn't in DC watching the smoke come out of the Pentagon.  It wasn't until I came back home the next summer before transferring to London that I had to deal with the issue.  Things had changed, and everyone else had dealt with it.  I was still going through a bit of shock.  The road to the Pentagon was being re-directed?  The flights from Washington National still did the weird flying down the Potomac, but why do they threaten to throw you in jail if you get up during the first 10 minutes of your flight from Washington, DC  What's the deal with the helicopters flying overhead all the time?  And why were there Hummers parked with surface to air missiles near the roads?

I had left one country and arrived back in what appeared to be a totally new one.  My girlfriend had walked me to the gate when I left for Suriname.  However that privilege, like the girlfriend, were long gone.  It was almost a Rip van Winkle effect.  I was gone for 2 years and so much had changed.  While my friends and family had dealt with it, I was still going through the trauma 10 months later.

You see, I think being a Foreign Service officer is difficult in this regards.  I work for the US Government, and I believe I'm still pretty darn red-blooded American.  However, when I live overseas, I feel there is now a barrier.  Lives go on, and while I remember things as before, things can change.  This comes into sharp focus when there is a major disaster or national trauma.  I was deeply saddened by it, but it really didn't come into sharp focus until I came back to the states.  This may be just my thoughts, but I wonder if anyone else has had the same experience. 

However, I do remember praying for those lost either during the crash, or afterwords trying to help others.  May this never happen again to anyone.